What is it? The mind is attempting to distinguish the noise. The sound of raindrops hitting the window in a consistent rhythm, it is pouring out there. A few drops falling on my cheeks, I turn away and refuse to close the window properly. I must catch up before the dream turning into fragments.
Who is she, who is he? That fountain. Those old houses from eighteenth and nineteenth centuries, all in black.
I am in a flower print dress facing the huge blue skies. The candy-floss clouds moving gently forward, they are giggling at the never-ending rush on the earth. Someone has glanced at me for the twentieth time, I know that without turning my head. Not once.
Wearing a pair of winter boots, I am making an effort to maintain balance so that I would not tumble over on the deep soft snow. Someone is observing my clumsy movement with a barely noticeable smile on his face. With my heavy handbag dangling from side to side, I bend slightly forward and take small steps towards him. “Take time. No worries”, a voice breaks in gently. I can sense his widened smile without lifting my head. Not once.
Let me piece them together, these disordered images. Stand still. Now.
The sun is shining brightly through the window. A brilliant start of the day. How could a morning filled with traces of sweetness lead to something else?
I am approaching the end of the journey. The Abstract is done, so is the Table of contents. The literature list requires revision certainly, but I should be able to submit it by the weekend. Ninety-seven pages. A one-year journey packed with excitement and frustration, progress and disappointment. All over now, soon. How many brain cells have died during this process? Thousands?
The presentation of the thesis is set in October, then my degree of Master of English Language is done. It is worth it, you must confess you are more fascinated by Virginia Woolf’s mastery of stream of consciousness than business models, Isabelle. You adore her visionary thinking, lyrical and mysterious language, do you not?
You adore Alice Munro, Patti Smith, and Haruki Murakami. The list is long. You recognise the patterns? You are too dreamy to battle in the business world. It is the language and literary sphere your spirit belongs to. You are on the right path now. Soon.
Sitting before my fellow computer in the pc-room, the fingers are moving smoothly from one character to another. The birds are making some sweet noise while playing hide and seek among the pear trees. The heart is singing a soft melody, as if it is celebrating the new prospect of life. The tree tunnel looks calm and fresh. The sunlight is shining through the heavy bushes. At this moment, life is surprisingly flawless.
An email has made its way to the inbox. It reads “due to differences in the way the data are searched in the system, some of the data in the thesis are imprecise. It’s really not your fault.” Those words, as heavy as stones, for a moment, are dragging the heart down to the waves. The mind is struggling to figure out something, the consequences. Invalid arguments and erroneous conclusion? Wasted research? No submission by the weekend?
Where are the birds? Are they tired of playing hide and seek? And the melody, all of a sudden, becomes senseless.
I hear the waves crashing against the rocks. Those waves, are they of the same character as the ones Virginia Woolf observed while drafting The Waves?
With love,
Isabelle ❤️
Some afterthoughts:
The story has a good ending which I think is unnecessary to include in the post. The intention was to record the moments and address the wave-like nature of life in the sense that it shifts constantly, from the most harmonious to the most dramatic, and perhaps less frequently, the other way around.
You did that well, Isabelle: describing the wavelike structure of life and the heart’s melodies, with its volume turned up and down. I must say I agree, good and bad moments come and go, surprisingly. Nice writing!
And congrats on almost being done!!! 🤗🤗🤗
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Life is in constant circulation it seems to me. Sometimes I wonder if I’m prepared for the roaring waves I’ll be so robust and mentally strong that I can tackle everything. And then I realise that I can never be fully prepared. Drama will always come as a huge surprise and it can be extremely harsh. All I can do is to stay strong and take it as it comes. Let it sink and find a way to deal with it. It will be fine in most cases. Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts with me! I appreciate it so much. 😊💜
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Soon you are going to have a great, new career. Congratulations!
Neil
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Thank you Neil! I look very much forward to it.
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Wonderful. You did it wonderfully. Loved the pics too. long time that you posted. Haha
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Thank you so much Shreya! I’ve been occupied with academic writing. Lovely to hear from you. 😊
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Well framed 👍
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Thank you so much!
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This is WONDERFUL, Isabelle!!! And by Your big smile, I see congratulations is in order! How absolutely fantastic that You know who You are and made the bold choice to change course and follow Your passion. It’s going to be very exciting watching Your dreams unfold and answer back!!! Sending You huge hugs and handfuls of singing, zinging confetti of the most sparkling light!!! Yay and Cheers!!! 😀🤗❤️💐💖🐬☀️!!!
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Oh thank you Katy! Your words are always so encouraging and dear to me. I came to a point that a re-evaluation of the purpose of life became a necessity. I made a decision and sticked to it. It’s been a long journey, but I never doubted about it. I know where I belong to. Following the heart is gorgeous. Thank you for the kind words and hugs. Lots and lots of hugs in return! 😊🌷❤️🌸☘️
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My pleasure, Isabelle…and YAY!!!!! 💖😊🌷☀️❤️!!!
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Glad to have you back sweetie! Wonderful job done – loved the gorgeous shots!❤️
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Thank you Richa! Appreciate your kind words very much. ❤️
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Referring to your comment on the post Notes from the heart, in which I wasn’t able to post a reply directly. Must be a WP issue.
Touched by the wonderful quote by Philip K. Dick. So true. Thank you Richa. ❤️ Have written it down. An important reminder and a great life lesson.
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Aww.. Thanks sweetie! Your comment was posted, wonder why WP said otherwise!
I am so glad that the quote resonated with you!❤️
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Nice story. It kept me reading till the end because I wanted to find out the ending. 👍
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I’m so glad you liked it. Thank you so much! 😊🌸
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I wish I could write as well as you 🙌🏻
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You write so well yourself Helena! Thank you so much! 😊🌸
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Welcome back Isabelle, nice story with beautiful pictures!!!
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Thank you Paulo! Always lovely to hear from you! 😊
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I love this Isabelle. I have taken my time to return to it, rather like a wave. I dreamed of an enormous storm this week and wrote a few words to remind myself how it felt. The moments you’ve shared here, so beautifully chosen, one upon another. Waves of life always bringing us to a new place we’ve never been before. This is very lovely. ❤️ I will look for the Virginia Woolf book. 😊 Do take care. 🌷
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Thank you for letting me know your thoughts and reflections on it, Suzanne. I also had some strange dreams recently but waves weren’t part of them. Yes waves, such a great metaphor for our life. The gentle ones are soul comforting but those hash ones are intimidating. Take care. 😊❤️🌸
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You did a wonderful job showing the shift of life, Isabelle! And I agree you belong to the world of thought and literature, not to the confines of a business career.
You are always a delight to read!
And the pictures were beautiful, as always.
Love, B.
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Thank you wholeheartedly, Basilike. I worked in finance and accounting for 13 years, time for a career shift I think. I can sense the challenges but how can I ignore the opportunity of living a life that feels right to me.
The picture on the top was taken in Santorini in July this year, so credit goes to your beautiful country. It’s been memory for life.
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The need to be true to yourself is something I can completely relate to. And I wish you the best.
Santorini was the first Aegean island I visited. True, it’s something you never forget.
Love, Basilike
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Very lovely! You are gifted!
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Oh thank you so much!
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It is November. You must be well and truly at the end of the journey. Congratulations. Isabelle! It is a such wonderful accomplishment. You have too much talent to let it go unrealised. I love your writing.
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Yes Vera, my degree is done and I’m working hard to follow the path, or even create that path for myself. It’s never easy to start a new career but I won’t let it go. Thank you so much for taking time to read the story and send me the lovely comment. Very much appreciated. Let me say it again, you write beautifully.
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I am sure you will follow your true path, and that you won’t let it go. Thank you once again, Isabelle, that really means a lot to me.
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Your words fall like a melodious stream: beautifully.
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Your words mean a lot to me, thank you.
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beautiful, you are very talented.
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Thank you for reading and for the kind comment.
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lovely story and lovely pictures 🙂
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Thanks so much for reading and for the nice comment! 😊
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